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I’ve never met my father. I wouldn’t know him if we passed in the street or bumped into one another grabbing a coffee. He left my mother (and me) when she was seven months pregnant. He just up and left. How could he do that? Does he have no conscience?

I often wonder if he feels guilty about it. He must have a bad conscience about leaving the woman he loved all alone at what should have been a most special time. I wonder about it a lot actually. It preoccupies my thoughts pretty much daily. What else could be so important that would make him leave? Did he need to go out and save the world? Was there something he had to do? Must have been big – perhaps he was searching for the Holy Grail – for the meaning of life? It certainly left me wondering what is the meaning of life. He must not have been fulfilled, he must have been searching for something. There must have been a void that my mother and I couldn’t fill. Perhaps love is not enough. I don’t understand that. I guess I am still young, I haven’t had a serious relationship yet, I am not old enough I don’t think, but all we get taught is to be a good person and to love everyone around us. If you create a baby, surely that is the ultimate act of love? I know I love my mum unconditionally, and my dog too.

Does he wonder about mum and me? Or does his conscience not allow it? Or has it blocked that part of his life out. Like erasing a bad scene from a movie. I don’t know how he could go on living after leaving, how his conscience would allow it. A baby was born (me!) and he didn’t care. It makes me feel guilty! Guilty that I was born. How is that fair? Sometimes I get so angry about him. It plays on my conscience-what I would say if I ever met him? Sometimes the anger rages so much I think I wouldn’t be able to speak, I might just hit him! And hard too. To try and make him feel some of the pain he has inflicted on mum and me, to share in the grief my mother had and still has I think. To see how selfish he was and just plain mean.

I can see how this anger over time will eat me alive, it will burn a hole in my stomach. I already get bad stomach cramps when I think about it too much. So I try hard not to, but it isn’t easy when every day you look in the mirror and wonder who is looking back.

When trying to get your book published, you may encounter plenty of road blocks ahead that can give you headaches. If you want minimize the hassles of getting your book published through Singapore book publishers, it will be a good idea to consider a few things first. Since getting your book published involves sending a query letter to the publishing company, it is important that you specify to whom you want to address it and not just to anyone in the department. Ideally, you want to send your query to someone who can make firm decisions about your query for book publishing. This person is usually the chief editor, and this means too that you have to make a query letter that will spark his interest, otherwise your manuscript might end up in the trash bin. Make sure your letter is concise –include all the important points of your book and explain to them why your book is worth publishing.

Scrabble is word game that is played by 2 to 4 individuals, players have to make well constructed words turn by turn, in order to score points. It is the most popular word game of all time that is administered by the Hasbro Company. At all times a scrabble player needs to ensure that he doesn’t use more than the allotted time for his turn else he will forfeit the turn and will be penalised by subtracting some points from his overall score. It may become difficult to remember words fast enough and you may be always on the losing end. Therefore it is recommended that we use a scrabble cheat to solve the purpose. This scrabble cheat is in the form of a scrabble word finder that automatically generates words for you. The word finder also includes the meanings of each word along with the attainable points that can be scored.

If there’s one thing that Cthulhu inspires the world over, it’s and increasing number of fan sites. The most recent Cthulhu site to pop up on the internet is The Bad Word, which touts itself as “Spreading the Bad Word about Cthulhu.”

The site has started off with an overview of the Cthulhu Mythos with promises to bring about a collection of all the different information on Cthulhu, Cthulhu sites, and Cthulhu-related products out there.

If the folks over at The Bad Word can pull it off, I have to say that it’s something that is needed.

I for one would greatly appreciate being able to browse a single site to find out everything that’s ever been made about Cthulhu – from the card game to the adorable Cthulhu plush – without having to make endless Google searches. After all, it can get pretty difficult to search for something when you don’t know what it is, and is great as Google is, the search engine isn’t much help for “all the Cthulhu products out there.”

So thumbs up for The Bad Word, and let’s hope they succeed in their rather ambitious project.